A very tragic event in my family occurred on Friday, May 28th. My Uncle took his own life at age 50. At the moment I received the call from my sister informing me of this, I had a hard time reacting to the sad news. I treated it like any bad news I hear in the media about a death. Not because I am insensitive, but I never knew my Uncle. This wasn't by choice, but my Uncle committed a crime that locked him up for years since I was very young and didn't understand why. It was very sad to hear of his death, but even sadder to hear he did this to himself. His death brought much confusion and grief to my family since he would have been let out in November 2011. I am not certain if my Uncle was a Christian, but I do remember hearing wonderful stories from my Dad as he gave the eulogy at his funeral and read many Bible passages as well as poems. It was very sad that the only way I got to know my Uncle was at his funeral. I was very thankful to attend his funeral to hear of his childhood stories and spend that grieving moment with my family. I believe my Grandmother took it the hardest to bury her own baby boy.
As I exited the funeral, I still felt very sad. This was not because of my Uncle's sad past, but because the funeral dwelled on his good works. I remember becoming Christian and asked my husband if anything ever happened to me I DO NOT want anyone to deliver any eulogies. It is not comforting to dwell at a funeral on the dead person’s good works. When we die, we dare not stand before God claiming how good we are. So that must not be the emphasis at a funeral. Besides, I believe many people to be dishonest about me. I am not a good person, straight A student, Mommy of the year, etc.
The dead person’s only hope is the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Instead of searching for good words to say about the person who died, we should deflect attention to a Person who died and rose again. We should preach Jesus — the cross, the atonement, the imputation of His righteousness, the resurrection — as the victor over death, hell, and the grave.
This beautiful message is comforting and our only hope, but that's not to say it still leaves us hurt at a funeral.
R.I.P.
Richard Ashley Wilkinson
August 14, 1959- May 28, 2010
